S4E11 — “Unsustainability”

3 min readMay 29, 2022


We’re unsustainable.

I eat meat. I tried to stop with that, but I’m caught in humanity’s traps.

With empathy, I’d change my habits whenever I’m reminded of animal’s suffering. I despise my existence as a human being. I am one in too many. Another mouth to feed, more resources to deplete.

I hate myself. I hate my weakness, my denial, my hypocrisy. We are not the only living beings on Earth that eat meat to survive, we’re merely the only ones with consciousness to understand what that implies.

It all starts when you look at the eyes of a cow desperate to save her child. You can’t stay indifferent. You know they are intelligent. You know they have feelings. They love, they make friends. And yet you still eat their meat.

And then you wonder how can you stop. There’re greens to consume, but they are expensive, and any consumption hurts the environment. Perhaps you think of lab created meat, but that’s still a long way to go.

Then you think of why on Earth would you require meat to survive, but the truth is many species do. You remember the wildlife series where you root for the prey to get away, and for the predator to fin a meal to feed its family. So you contemplate the unreasoning of such primitive ways of life. And none of it makes you feel any better.

You re understand the destructive spiral we are in. That it doesn’t matter if we all eat crops, the time it takes to plant them can’t follow the speed we eat them. It’s consumerism at its best paired with a sloppy management of leftovers and distribution. Some eat too much, others are dying of starvation. And instead of focusing on how we treat our resources, humanity keeps highlighting the things we cannot control. We don’t seem concerned about the air pollution anymore, just on how gases will warm up a planet that is perfectly fine without us. It doesn’t matter if we pollute with out new batteries for every single car or phone we buy each year, because the industry says electric is green. But that’s far from the truth, and yet again, the masses are controlled by those who need their money.

It seems ironic that those who claim electric power is the solution don’t appreciate when their land is wanted for the resources that are required to produce the batteries they use. A few believe there are alternatives to planes, but everything has a cost and the lives we live requires fast transports to be possible.

And there are those who choose an admirable life in self sustainable houses, but that alternative is not something we could all choose.

Somewhere, it seems people held to this romantic idea that we can all live in prosperity and consume resources of any kind without leaving a single footprint. And the industry is taking advantage of that, making you believe their alternatives are the only ones, or the ones that have no effect on this planet. But that’s untrue.

See… It’s hard to admit that the problem here is that we exist.

We are too many demanding too much. There’s a horrible lack of education, empathy, and intelligent resource management. Nobody has the right answers, and so we all keep suffering at the sight of our insignificance to resolve what we significantly exhaust.

There’s no wonder so many of us develop all sort of diseases. We can’t take it anymore. A few can feel everything around, and end up damaging their bodies with chronical diseases that have no cure, or mental minds that can’t cope with all of this.

How could one expect anything less? This species was always rot and now we don’t even try to hide it anymore. And somehow, it seems most are okay with it.

I don’t know what to do.

23rd November 2021




It doesn’t matter my name, where I’m from, nor how I came here. Like you, I’m searching. Lost in this world, with so much to speak up, but no one to listen.